Shea Butters, here, manservant to alleged stars, Christopher Rice and Eric Shaw Quinn. After a long and arduous year lined with piles of smashed china and torn draperies, and capped off with many, many frantic late phone calls to contractors and attorneys, Mssrs. Rice and Quinn finally managed to launch their little Internet radio program, The Dinner Party Show With Christopher Rice & Eric Shaw Quinn. If you listened in on Sunday November 11th to their premiere episode, or if you treated yourself to the podcast currently available on iTunes, you were subjected to a wildly expansive conversation indeed.
After a perfunctory welcome to the many live listeners who tuned in using the site’s streaming player, Mssrs. Rice and Quinn unveiled a scintillating buffet of topics, including the sudden upsurge in UFO sightings along the border of India and China, the real origins of Veterans Day and the imminent – and in some circles, dreaded – release of the Twilight saga’s final instalment. Perhaps it was some sense of familial obligation that guided their first celebrity guest, Anne Rice, to the dinner table. Regardless, her presence proved both insightful and soothing when the show’s hosts parsed Stephanie Meyer’s recent interview on Jimmy Kimmel, in which the Twilight author confessed to never having met a real vampire. Mrs. Rice, the queen of modern vampire literature, made the confession that she too has never met a real vampire and is often put in the unfortunate position of having to break said news to her readers, many of whom are desperate to believe that there are true children of night stalking the shadowy corners of our world.
And then there were the special correspondents.
Oh, dear. Special, indeed.
Where to begin on this front… I’ve been struggling with the right words to describe them in all their distinctly…American glory. First there was Breck Artery, the rather full-throated newsman whose take on Mitt Romney’s crushing defeat in the Presidential election was anything but “fair and balanced”. He was followed shortly thereafter by Twan, Queen of the Stars, who makes a habit of perverting his astrological readings into punitive dispatches directed at unnamed individuals who disappointed him the week prior. The relationship expert was next. JoNell Samms. Her advice on maintaining a long-term marriage? Avoid your husband at all costs, and see to it that he spends most of his hours away on fishing trips with his friend. (The same handsome male friend with whom he likes to quote lines from a certain Oscar nominated film about cowboys of a different …er…stripe.)
And just in case this buffet seems lacking in dysfunctional dishes, let us not forget Jordan Ampersand, the young man from West Hollywood of indeterminate career background, who Christopher apparently selected to be the show’s critic-at-large without first consulting Eric. Jordan’s take on popular culture is as shrill and grating as his high-pitched voice. However, there is a nice bit of suspense here, as we sit back and wonder whether or not Jordan will make it through his tempestuous exchange with Eric without being maimed or snuffed out altogether like one of the candles on the table.
I must confess. I do have a bit of affection for the last special correspondent to make an appearance on the premiere episode of The Dinner Party Show. Buzz Kilton, the Bay Area Culture Reporter, is nothing if not literate. Although in all candor I do admit, her egregiously feminist interpretation of an episode of iCarly does make her out be a bit of a pill. But after listening to the individuals who preceded her, a handful of pills may be exactly what you’re craving.
So there you have it folks. The very first, and unfortunately, not last, episode of the Dinner Party Show With Christopher Rice & Eric Shaw Quinn, boiled down for those with discerning palates and limited schedules. It wasn’t the complete disaster I was anticipating. And there were glimpses of genuine wit amidst the clamor of pop culture, scandal and artistic excessiveness. Do tune in again for next Sunday’s LiveCast, when Christopher and Eric’s Dinner Guests will be Trent Vanegas, the creator of the wildly popular entertainment blog, Pink Is The New Blog, and New York Times Bestselling thriller writer Gregg Hurwitz.
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